Author: absolutwillie

last night I dreamt of my birthday – and for the first time ever, I remember a hint if dread… I’m edging away from 30 – which is not a frightening thought, really. 40 isn’t so scary either. I dated a 40 year old in my 20s, no biggie. (besides the fact that he turned out to be a schizophrenic sociopath… but enough of that.)

so why the sense of dread?
perhaps it has more to do with the fact that my contract at TFC is comming to an end – and I haven’t found a new job yet. or perhaps I’m worried about financing my trip to SA in August? possibly. most likely, though, I’m scared I won’t be able to provide for my loved ones.

sheesh!! when did I grow up?

I’ll be 3¹in three weeks.
I’ll be unemployed in three months.

*breathe*
that’s plenty of time for someone to respond to my applications.
I’m trying to control things again and putting the cart before the horse in the process.

hey! It’s Wednesday – half way to the weekend ;0) let’s all relax and have a good one, okay?

hugs,
W

it is finally friday – and I’m doing quite a bit better than earlier this week. taking Rod’s advice was, once again, a very good idea.

have you noticed how we tend to mess up our breathing when we’re rushed, stressed or just plain out of it? it’s almost as if we forget to breathe all together sometimes! and that’s just plain unhealthy (if not deadly).

so yeah, I slowed myself down and remembered to breathe. the few things that were actually affected(as opposed to what the Fear tells you beforehand), didn’t cause any major catastrophies. not even as much as a raised eyebrow, to tell the truth.

so why the rush?
buggered if I know.

NB: the whip wielding bastard edging you over – is probably just you.

have an easy Friday.
(facebook can wait.)

following up on yesterday’s post:
• no pause button yet
• phone tests added to the mix
• printing client in SA needs re-educating (insists on providing duotone bitmaps in blue – but expecting CMYK-quality grays)
• same client (“designer”) expects artwork with no color and no outline to print
• new teacher is still a prima donna
• Saturday is an early work day
• 10 day warhammer trial expired without me (grumble)

but I’m not panicking anymore. popped a Risperdal and decided to take it one step at a time. if I end up late – so be it. at least I’m showing up!

would somebody please take their foot off the accelerator – I’m getting dizzy! somehow the world is speeding up and it feels like I’m losing traction… is there a rest stop next to this freeway?

ugh… I know and appreciate that I’m not in control of everything. it’s just that I’ve secretly been dreaming up a schedule leading up to august’s trip to SA. and that entire pie in the sky is threatening to flop.

Peter might not be able to go to SA anymore. and although I am thankful for his new job – the thought of having to face 3 weeks (training) without him during may (on top of august) is unsettling. to put it mildly.

time’s up! at my station now, running for the bus.

press pause!

memo to self: putting on and taking off the raincoat’s pants might be a schlep – but it will save you from looking like you peed yourself after 10mins of driving your scooter in the rain. it takes a lot to look cool and unfazed with a wet crotch in public… grace and dignity, my dear.
grace and dignity…

it’s been a while, but I’ve caught up with life and all seems to be well and set. at least for the time being.

a brief summary:
• Ben was hit by a car last Wednesday – thankfully he only picked up some scrapes and muscle aches!
• Peter came back from Japan :0)
• I sleep better now *grin*
• PoPo is practically fully grown and more fun than ever (despite having taken to peeing on my lap every chance he gets).
• Peter brought his plasma tv from his parents’ place. (big, black and beautiful – must check Rambler’s blog.)
• we spent Sunday buying, bulding and setting up a multimedia pc to go with the tv – hdmi rocks!
• loads of cables still need to be tidied and hidden.
• Ben is on leave this week, so I’ll be working more classes (no overtime though).
• expected max for today: 30Celsius
• swetting? me? never! (perspiring profusely, yes.)

catch you on the flip side!

PS. FJ: I’ll remember to measure my resting rate one if these mornings!

dunno why, but I’ve had trouble sleeping these last two days. meaning I oversleep… which sucks when you run on public transport.